Thursday, November 20, 2008

Kyle Calder, Get Off the Ice!

"Meh, I'm such a weenie.
I have lady parts.
Brown is such a badass that when I ran into him I hurt myself.
I'm a bigger whiner than Crosby.
I think I'm better than everyone else because I'm Russian.
Oh damn, that Slovenian kid is pretty good.
Why are the fans booing me?? I'm "injured" they should be applauding me since I got up.
Oh right, they're booing because I'm a girl and I have sand in my vagina."

Kings 5, Capitals 2. Here's what each player's goal said:

Doughty: "I'm still awesome."
O'Sullivan: "That's right bitches!"
Brown: "Suuuuuuuuuck it, Ovechkin!!!!"
Handzus: "Will Coach take Calder off my line?"
Kopitar: "Fuck y'all!"

My biggest gripe about the game was that Kyle Calder got 15:36 of playing time, which is 10 minutes more than he should have gotten. He played alongside Handzus and Simmonds on the third line, or as Murray calls it, the checking line, which apparently means that he has to be on the ice all the damn time regardless of how horrible he does. Seriously people, that was the absolute worst game I have ever seen Calder play. He continuously fumbled the puck failing on many occassion to cleanly collect the puck and make a decent pass or scoring attempt. And I lost count of all the scoring opportunities that never occurred because he turned it over despite his linemates doing everything they could to give him a prime scoring chance. There were several fans in my section that started shouting, "Get Calder off the ice!!!" because it seemed like he f'ed up something on every single shift and it killed me that he continued to receive so much playing time. At least the Kings won otherwise this post would have been a full blown "I hate Calder" rant.

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