Monday, November 5, 2007

Cloots

Jean-Baptiste du Val-de-Grâce, baron de Cloots, oops, nope, not that Cloots. My favorite player, Dan Cloutier, is 1-4 with Manchester. Half of me wants to laugh and the other wants to provide my shoulder for him to cry on. He's 31 years old (will turn 32 in April) and I wonder..."is Dan Cloutier's NHL career over?" An LA Kings fan got hold of the edit button on his Wikipedia page and had some fun by including the following "facts":

His former LA Kings teammates nicknamed him as "The Beach Ball" because he couldn't stop a beach ball. He has been known to lack talent and is currently ranked last in fantasy sports by yahoosports.com.


Well, the bit about being ranked last in Fantasy Hockey is definitely true, or at least it was true before the season began. Oh Cloots...I know, the coach keeps forcing you to play the best teams in the league and everyone is jealous of your millions and millions of gold coins that you keep in your locker. So what if the younger guys are pissed off at you because you come out of the shower and dry off with a wad of Benjamins. Most of them probably won't even make close to a million per season so they have to live the life of a gangsta through someone. Live it up now Cloots, because if your stunning 1-4 record is indicative of anything so far, it's that you won't have a career in North America after the end of this season.

3 comments:

Teebz said...

They should move him out of the net, and let him be a fighter. He was a better fighter than a goaltender in his career. At age 32, the guy could essentially revitalize his career. I will give him this: he does know how to skate. He could be the next Sean Avery in LA.

KQ949 said...

Just when my nightmares start to subside, you bring them back! "Ohh, Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling..." and YES, those are actually the lyrics! I couldn't believe it when I looked it up! "The summer's gone, and all the flowers are dying
'Tis you, 'tis you must go and I must bide." Au revoir, Dan. Dont permettent à la brindille de vous frapper sur votre voie dehors. (that loosely translates to goodbye Dan. Don't let the stick smack you on your way out.

Marie said...

teebz: that is a really good idea. He was (or maybe still is) a pretty damn good fighter. All last season I kept waiting for him to drop the gloves with someone and was so disappointed when he never did.

kq949: haha, I can't believe those are the lyrics! Glad I could be of service to you and bring back such wonderful thoughts of Cloutier ;)