Predictions for December

Five games into December and we're 1-3-1. Two losses to Phoenix, one goaltender lost to the owner of the stringiest mullet in the NHL, one SO loss to a former average Kings netminder, and one blowout win to make us daydream of that one game where everything seemed shiny and bright. Aaaaahhhh, is that what it feels like to win? It happens so sparingly that when we do get a win it's like we've won a playoff round, something we haven't done since...I don't even remember. I was probably in college which explains my four-year gap in lack of Kings knowledge.

While Tracy was pretty spot on with her Kings/Coyotes pregame analysis, it looks like I wasn't too far off myself. Well, except for actually thinking that Nagy would play. Note, he wasn't a healthy scratch, but rather he was sidelined with a hip pointer. I'm sorry...a what? A quick google search confirms that 'hip pointer' is in fact a real injury and in case you're as medically clueless as I am, here is a quick description of it:

A hip pointer refers to a direct contact injury to the iliac crest of the pelvis. The iliac crest is commonly known as the "hip bone", a misnomer. The term hip pointer is somewhat confusing. It can refer to a deep bruise of the muscle and bone, a small chip fracture or even a complete break. Typically, however, this term refers to a severe bruise and not a fracture.

Jeez, Nagy, lay off the belly dancing. Did you hit an old man's cane while you were shaking your hips one too many times? I was correct in stating that the Kings can't hold onto a lead unless they're up by 7 goals. Also, the top line produced again and the power play unit capitalized again for the fourth game in a row. Our valiant effort to tie the score in the third period was branded useless since we decided right off the ensuing faceoff to stop playing.

Hmm, according to the Toronto Sun (reported on Yahoo!) and Ottawa Sun (reported on ESPN), Crow is in the hot seat. I remember a month or two ago reading on the Yahoo! Rumors page that players weren't too happy about Crow. I didn't think twice about the rumor, oh no wait, I did have to answer to my boss and Finny, both Ducks fans, who were more than happy to forward me the article. However, this time around, I did give the rumor a thought since I wouldn't be surprised if Crow is actually in the hot seat, but yet I doubt he'll be fired because it's only his second season as the Kings coach, DL seems determined to build around this 'youth' movement, we have 5 new faces from the off-season, and if Crow were fired, who would replace him? I'm not too familiar with the list of available of coaches but I bet Dave Taylor is having a good laugh over the Kings' failed season (oh yes, I did just call it quits for the season). While DL is furiously poring over his notes trying to figure out where he went wrong by signing Scott Thornton, Alyn McCauley, John Zeiler, Tom Preissing, Ladislav Nagy, Brian Willsie, Kevin Dallman, Jon Klemm, John Zeiler, and John Zeiler, Dave Taylor is probably having a grand ol' time down in Texas enjoying the rodeo.

I really thought the Kings were going to fair better this season compared to the recent past. It's completely disheartening and frustrating as a fan who watches each game, forks over the money to attend games (although season ticket holders are way more financially invested than I could ever be), and invests time thinking, listening, reading, talking, and writing about the team. I feel like I'm preparing to torture myself every time I turn on the TV to watch a game or buy tickets. The only way I can get through each season with bright, cheery thoughts of "there's always next year" is by joking about how bad we are and thinking about the young talented players that continue to progress and show off their skills.

So with the sentimental crap out of the way, here's more joking to get myself and fellow tortured Kings fans through to the New Year. There are 11 games remaining in December. Here's how I think the Kings will fair against their lucky opponents.

Dec 10th v. Vancouver:
We were lucky to skate out of GM Place with a win. Was it Pyatt who clanked one off the crossbar in the third period? Hey, Jack, where are you? Your only goal of the season came against Luongo; maybe tonight Calder can feed you another beauty that you can tip in. However, I don't think Aubin will have another fortunate outing against Vancouver.
Kings 1, Vancouver 4

Dec 12th v. Chicago:
Which noob will embarrass the Kings? Remember when Robert Lang was on the Kings? Too bad we let him go before he actually developed into a decent player.
Kings 2, Chicago 3 (SO)

Dec 13th v. Dallas:
I think Dave Taylor should drop the puck with Matty and Blake at the faceoff (I know it's not possible!). I'm beginning to feel like the two wins we have against Dallas this season were a fluke. Have we ever had a goalie as good as Turco? And Vachon doesn't count because that was so long ago. Blerg.
Kings 0, Dallas 3

Dec 15th v. Minnesota:
For some reason I'm actually optimistic about this game. I miss Demitra. O'Sullivan is going to score tonight.
Kings 3, Minnesota 1

Dec 17th v. Colorado:
Someone will take a run at Smyth. Someone will cheap shot whoever is in Colorado's net. This game will not be pretty.
Kings 3, Colorado 4 (OT)

Dec 19th v. Detroit:
Haha, that's funny.
Kings 1, Detroit 4

Dec 21st v. Columbus:
There's no way we're losing another game to Columbus. The BJs were fierce on the PK so at least we'll know what to expect this time. Leclaire is no longer on a 5 shoutouts in 7 games streak.
Kings 4, Columbus 2

Dec 22nd v. Nashville:
I highly doubt the Kings will net another 6 goals against the Preds but I still think we'll win. My hatred for Tootoo only continues to grow.
Kings 4, Nashville 1

Dec 26th v. San Jose:
I'll be at this game and considering it's the day after Christmas, I'm going to be so POd if the Kings don't win or if the Kings at least don't put in a tremendous effort.
Kings 3, SJ 2 (SO)
P.S. My mom likes the SO so here's hoping she gets to see another one. Last year the family saw the Kings play Phoenix on the day after Xmas and I think my mom only came so that she wouldn't be left out. I think she was completely bored throughout the entire game. Then the shootout started and her eyes lit up and you could see her get really into it and she even looked at me and said, "Oh, I like this!" It absolutely warmed my heart to see her happy to be there and to watch her enjoy a hockey game since that was the first game she's been to in years.

Dec 29th v. Colorado:
Are Peter Budaj and Jose Theodore actually that good or does the rest of team just make them look good?
Kings 0, Colorado 3

Dec 30th v. Chicago:
I wonder if Aubin will still be healthy at this point. And what if Barbs is still recovering? Would Crow call up Ersberg or Cloutier? What do you think the reunion party would be like for Cloutier? "Ehhhh...man. So...you're playing tonight? That's cool....I guess."
Kings 4, Chicago 3

So for the remainder of December I have the Kings going 5-4-2. Hey! One game above 0.500! And this whole time I thought I was being too harsh on the guys. You know, I'd be happy with that outcome. Ah well, a girl can dream, right?